Sometimes, change is Good

Heraclitus by Hendrick ter Brugghen

Image via Wikipedia

You may have heard it said; the only thing constant is change.  Heraclitus said that.  Thank you Google search.  I just love modern technology, when it works!  I used to think that only dead things don’t change, until I realized they decompose.  That’s change too.  Not especially fun to think about, still, necessary to remember.

When I choose to make a change I think, feel and behave differently than I do when some outside source or circumstance insists on it.  Looking at things from a different perspective has been a catalyst in recent weeks.  And I am so amazed to realize it has been available to me all along.

In writing about this, now, my intent is to avoid recovery speak and psychobabble and “new age” crap.  Oops, did I say that out loud.  Sorry.  I’ve spent so many years in and around recovery that my intent may not be easily achieved.  Telling the truth, as I see it, is important.  Too many important things tend to get glossed over, if you ask me.  Since you haven’t specifically asked me, no one will lose face if you leave now.

It is becoming more clear to me every day that the most important person to tell the truth to is myself.  The most important person for me to reveal my secrets to is myself.  However odd this may sound, waking up to the fact that I have been keeping some pretty strong resentments under wraps was startling.  Going through life like Scarlet O’Hara: I’ll think about that tomorrow, is very limiting when tomorrow never actually comes.  Cause it’s always today!  The backlog of things to think about is awesome.   I don’t know that my attitude actually sucked, every day.  That’s statistically impossible.  It just sucked enough days to add up to an intimidating number.  Fortunately, the solution is simple and I’m comfortable with the process.

A little bit of recovery speak is required here, cause it was though the 12 Steps, seen from a different perspective that the willingness to change was born.  Don’t really see it happening any other way, for me.  I happen to be working with someone who is comfortable in her own skin, more often than not, who can listen as I spout what might be considered heresy by others.  And ask challenging questions and allow me to draw conclusions.  Which means, she can hear what I’m saying and feels free to disagree, without attacking.  Find yourself a friend like that, if you don’t already have one.  Truth is, I have a couple of friends like that and esteem them as more valuable than gold.

I still don’t think I can honestly say that I love change, let’s not get ridiculous!  I just feel much more open to it than I ever have before.  Life is exciting again and consistently.  Good grief, Charlie Brown, I’m blogging about stuff usually reserved to church basements!  And loving it!  Yup, sometimes change is good!

 

 

 

 

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5 Comments (+add yours?)

  1. Karen
    Oct 12, 2011 @ 07:36:14

    Excellent observation regarding change. Your second paragraph reminds me of the 2nd “A” in the “3 As” (Awareness, Acceptance, Action). Whenever change has been introduced by an outside force (I’m resisting calling it “imposed upon me”),
    then I’ve fought it tooth-and-nail which just increased my pain and interfered with any healthy perspective or action. When I finally come around to accepting, only then am I able to move on and make progress and a healthy contribution to my new scene. Of course, if I’m making the choice for change, then I already have at least some acceptance. So…if I could keep myself from seeing change brought on by external sources as and “imposition” and allow myself to make a choice to accept the change….I’ll avoid a lot of pain caused by my resistance. It’s pretty simple, but my knee-jerk reaction to change I wasn’t expecting…or change I’m afraid I won’t be able to manage well, is to resist. I need to remember that it’s my resistance that causes my pain. (how’s that for psychobabble?)

    Reply

  2. noreenheath333
    Oct 12, 2011 @ 20:29:50

    Seemed pretty straight forward to me. Where I seem to get stuck too often is at the awareness level, don’t always see the resistance. Evidently my denial system is pretty well enmeshed into my thinking process, camouflaged or something.

    I have had a couple of awakenings in the past few weeks, about attitude,expectations, perceptions. They work hand in hand and impact whether or not the three a’s ever make it to consciousness, or not.

    I hope this makes sense to you, cause I’m kind of tired right now and just wanted to get something up for postaday2011. Was tickled to see I got a comment and delighted it was from you! Thanks Karen.

    Reply

  3. postage rates
    Oct 16, 2011 @ 17:31:49

    I’ve officially entered giddy tired mode but the exam is over & we ended the night w Geranium Essential Oil hand massages because we rock!

    Reply

    • noreenheath333
      Oct 18, 2011 @ 14:50:37

      You obviously rock and I’ll bet your hands felt great. I’ve found geranium to be excellent at pain relief. Usually combine it with chamomile for best effect. Walked three miles in horrible shoes, thought I was crippled for days. Used geranium, chamomile and lavender. Was ready to dance within half an hour. Rock on! Thanks for reading and commenting.

      Reply

  4. Kassie Gunter
    Nov 02, 2011 @ 08:14:58

    Thank you for the auspicious writeup. It in fact was a amusement account it. Look advanced to more added agreeable from you! However, how can we communicate?

    Reply

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